Inert Ramblings

Quite a few years ago, when I was living in the Mission Hill combat zone just outside of Boston, I was a Full Body Cast member of the Cambridge Rocky Horror Picture Show. In and of itself, that fact should have classified me as a pervert, but I had the distinct honor of meeting someone who far surpassed my own perversions while walking to a cast party one crisp October evening in the Fall of 1994.

A few blocks from Harvard Square, I ran into a rather intoxicated transvestite. Or, more accurately, he ran into me. After exchanging pleasantries and listening to a highly amusing diatribe about UFOs and gender inversion rays, my newfound friend lifted up his skirt to demonstrate how he was forced to tuck his penis between his legs to emulate his previous feminine heritage now that he’d been turned into a man.

Without skipping a beat, the friend I was walking with blurted out, “so, are you a Eunuch, or is it just cold out here?”

Unfortunately, her wit was lost in the moment, for it was quite cold outside. We simply received a blank stare and an awkward silence followed by accusations of being “one of them.” A few moments later, the tucked wonder slipped off into the night, never to be seen again.

I really wish I hadn’t been reminded of this memory…